Zombie Strippers


by Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

At last, after more than a century of being banned and censored, the last remaining unpublished work by the Bronte sisters has come to the silver screen.

Can you still call it a silver screen if the movie is in color?

But I digress.

The work was created not by the three Bronte sisters you are probably familiar with, but the lesser-known Kimmi Bronte, the Bronte's saucy little tart of a half-sister. Interestingly, her original manuscript for Zombie Strippers had hearts over both "i's" in the title instead of those boring old dots.

Imagine this cast: Kenneth Branagh, Meryl Streep, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, Siobhan McKenna, and the legendary reclusive acting genius Nicol Williamson ...

Those are just six of the many great actors who neither appeared in this film nor would even be willing to acknowledge having heard of it. Although I'm pretty sure Nicholson would like it.

You have undoubtedly already deduced from the title that Zombie Strippers is not a filmed version of a Victorian romance novel, but rather a nasty, silly little bit of comedy gorotica which can best be described as a Troma-style film, although Troma actually had, to the best of my knowledge, nothing to do with it.

The story takes place about six years in the future, in the middle of President Bush's fourth term. (Oh, forget that silly constitution. It's just a piece of paper.) The president has taken the country into several more wars in the Middle East, stretching the American armed services so thin that the only possible solution to their personnel requirements is to re-animate dead soldiers into zombie super-soldiers, who will exhibit the same American fighting spirit with none of that pesky fear of death. That is the theory, at least, but the experiments go wrong, and an elite special forces unit is called in to eradicate the useless laboratory zombies. The soldiers do an excellent job, but one of them is bitten by a zombie in the course of the action. Knowing that his colleagues will have to shoot him in the head, he escapes through a basement window before he can zombify enough for the others to discover his condition.

It pretty much goes without saying that he ends up in an illegal strip joint where he doesn't look much different from the other patrons. As his condition degenerates, he eventually attacks the lead stripper (Jenna Jameson) and zombifies her. It turns out that the zombie virus has a different effect on women. While zombified men turn into the shambling, slow-moving, brainless George Romero kind of zombies, the women turn into cunning, fast-moving new-wave zombies who retain all their brainpower, but acquire an irresistible urge to devour human flesh. Their energy, athleticism and lack of inhibition makes the men in the audience think they are perfect strippers - well, at least until they get a guy alone in the Champagne Room.

Soon there are some more zombie strippers, and this really ticks off the other girls, who get booed off the stage because the guys want zombies, dammit! The club's #2 stripper, who has always wanted to be #1, finally gets herself zombified, whereupon she challenges #1 Jenna to a dance-off, which degenerates into the ultimate catfight in the manner of the Black Knight fight in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, with the girls ripping off each other's flesh, tearing out each other's limbs, and so forth.

It's the most Tromatic film not actually created by Troma, and that should pretty much tell you whether you will like it. It is pretty funny in a lot of ways that Troma films can be funny: wildly exaggerated splatter and gore, (deliberately?) bad performances, black humor, and lowbrow jokes, all of it as dumb as can be, yet salted with some recondite observations from the great existential philosophers. The adventure takes place in the town of Sartre, for example, and one of the zombie strippers notes that Nietzsche makes a lot more sense after one dies. The strippers spend more time discussing existentialism than make-up, and one can understand that. After all, zombies disdain make-up, and who is better prepared to understand the true nature of life and death than somebody who has tried both?

You get the picture. You may actually like this if you go for comedy/horror films. Zombie Strippers does not skimp on the nudity or the outrageousness and, while it is not my kind of movie, I admire its demented, outré sense of energy.


* DVD info not yet available.







45 Metacritic.com (of 100)


4.3 IMDB summary (of 10)


It was distributed in an unusual manner, appearing simultaneously as a very limited theatrical release and a pay-per-view cable special. Financial details have not been released as of our press time.



  • Jenna Jameson strips before and after zombiehood, including full frontal and rear shots and a brief rear view of the cave of the seventh delight.
  • Shamron Moore does some non-zombie stripping, including full nudity in one of the clips. Shamron finishes her appearance in a crazy topless catfight with Jenna Jameson.
  • Roxy Saint strips before and after zombiehood, topless only.
  • Penny Drake is topless with pasties.
  • At least one other woman (a topless waitress in the club) shows some flesh.



Web www.scoopy.com

Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:


It is a solid genre movie, but specifically designed to appeal to the small Troma audience.