Headless Body in Topless Bar (1995) from Tuna

Headless Body in Topless Bar is a story whose title was inspired by an actual 1983 N.Y. Post headline, although the film has only a passing resemblance to the episode summarized by that headline.


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A man holds up a small topless bar. The bartender pulls a shotgun, and the robber kills him. Later he will get his head sawed off, presumably so that the title makes sense.

He then holds everyone in the place captive while he figures out what to do. Captives include stripper Jennifer MacDonald, who is topless and in a thong through most of the film, a corporate attorney who is there to have kinky sex with MacDonald before he catches the last commuter train home, two rowdy friends on their way back from a hockey game, and a guy in a wheelchair with MS. Most of the film is a sort of truth or dare game which the robber forces everyone to play. He has some ability at it because he has been in therapy and counseling in prison most of his life.

DVD info from Amazon.

  • 4-disc Box Set

  • Full-screen format

The film has plusses. MacDonald has lovely, all-natural breasts, which she proudly displays early and often. Her previous job was as an international spy, and she is fluent in 6 languages. She hung out in a strip club to prepare for the role, and even worked one night there. The characters are well developed, and the personalities are interesting. On the other hand, 99% of the film takes place in the club, and it is very talky.

I would say that it is a very good example of what it is -- an odd indie made on no budget with relatively obscure talent. I'm sure by now you have decided if it is your kind of film or not.  

The Critics Vote

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The People Vote ...

IMDb guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of excellence, about like three and a half stars from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm watchability, about like two and a half stars from the critics. The fives are generally not worthwhile unless they are really your kind of material, about like two stars from the critics. Films under five are generally awful even if you like that kind of film, equivalent to about one and a half stars from the critics or less, depending on just how far below five the rating is.

My own guideline: A means the movie is so good it will appeal to you even if you hate the genre. B means the movie is not good enough to win you over if you hate the genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an open mind about this type of film. C means it will only appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover appeal. D means you'll hate it even if you like the genre. E means that you'll hate it even if you love the genre. F means that the film is not only unappealing across-the-board, but technically inept as well.

Based on this description, this film is a C.

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