The Opening of Misty Beethoven
Opening of Misty Beethoven (1975) was produced and directed by Radley
Metzger, so it is no wonder that it is widely considered the best
adult film of all time. It is an adult version of Pygmalion (or My
Fair Lady, if you prefer) and is about a young girl (Misty Beethoven,
played by Constance Money) who gives hand-jobs in a Paris adult
theater. She is discovered by Dr. Love (Jamie Gillis), a sexologist
who takes a bet that he can teach her enough to be the belle of the
ball at a famous magazine publisher's annual party.
|The film is actually not
as explicit as I remembered, and Metzger builds a lot of erotic
tension by not showing everything every time. There are times
when the dialogue is brilliant, such as when the flight attendant
asks, "Ok, First Class, will that be SEX or non-SEX?" Gloria
Leonard also makes her film debut here as the steady girlfriend of the
magazine publisher. Leonard and Gillis joined for a feature length
commentary, which is worth the price of the DVD. For instance, I
finally learned why Linda Lovelace did not expose her breasts in
Deep Throat. She has a long scar from an accident on her stomach.
|it is a
hard-core sex film. Refer to the commentary.
|Metzger is the one who
named Constance Money. The two did not get along at all, and when he
ask her how she wanted to be credited, she said "anything
but Constance." Naturally, he named her Constance, and used
Money, which is the only thing that mattered to her, as the last name.
||It's a hard-core, but this is a very,
very good one -- so good in fact that it premiered at the Four
Seasons restaurant in New York.
- With their
votes ... IMDB summary: IMDb voters
score it 6.2, pretty damned good for a sex film!
guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of
excellence, about like three and a half stars
from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm
watchability, about like two and a half stars
from the critics. The fives are generally not
worthwhile unless they are really your kind of
material, about like two stars from the critics.
Films under five are generally awful even if you
like that kind of film, equivalent to about one
and a half stars from the critics - or less,
depending on just how far below five the rating
guideline: A means the movie is so good it
will appeal to you even if you hate the genre. B means the movie is not
good enough to win you over if you hate the
genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an
open mind about this type of film. C means it will only
appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover
appeal. D means you'll hate it even if you
like the genre. E means that you'll hate it even if
you love the genre. F means that the film is not only
unappealing across-the-board, but technically
inept as well.
Based on this
description, this film is a C to C+, a good hardcore, but not
for mainstream audiences.
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