by Johnny Web (Uncle
Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)
Dirty O'Neil is a long forgotten artifact of
the early 70s drive-in era, and contains most of the
usual characteristics of that sub-genre: a bit of
violence, a few car chases, some comedy, amateurish
acting, confusing editing, and lots of attractive female
The titular O'Neil is a tall, handsome young cop in what
must be, according to the dialogue, the most boring
small town in America. The lack of action gives the
patrolman plenty of time to pursue his favorite
extracurricular activity, which is to bed beautiful
women. The plot, such as it is, centers around a trio of
lowlifes who wander into the sleepy town while on the
lam. It isn't long before the baddies realize the quiet
town might represent some easy pickin's, so they start
robbing and raping, and thus forcing the laid-back local
cop to fight some real crime, big city style.
This effort may be a cut above the typical drive-in
fare, if for no other reason than it was scripted by
Leon Capetanos, who would later team with mainstream
director Paul Mazursky to write some fairly good scripts
like Moon Over Parador, Moscow on the Hudson, The
Tempest and Down and Out in Beverly Hills.
Unfortunately, Capetanos didn't restrict his
participation in Dirty O'Neil to scripting duties. He
also directed the film, and he showed far less talent in
that capacity, as the film is clumsy and poorly paced.
Within a year Capetanos would give up on directing, or
maybe it gave up on him. Either way, he eventually
managed a solid career as a screenwriter.
The exploitation elements of this film are oddly
inconsistent. At times it's balls-to-the-wall violence
and full frontal nudity. At other times, the violence
(from the same perpetrators) is remarkably subdued and
the sex is bewilderingly coy. A couple of examples of
- Sultry Anitra Ford was no
stranger to screen nudity, having bared all in
several other films from the same era. In this
flick, however, Ford grabs the cop's gun, tells him
to undress her and ... nothing. The scene cuts off
- Beautiful Ella Edwards plays a
hooker who throws Dirty O'Neil a complimentary fuck,
but nothing is seen on camera. The invitation is
portrayed, and the post-coital discussion, but
nothing in between!
- August, 1974 Playmate Jeane
Manson is brutally raped by all three of the
baddies, and the film devotes several minutes of
running time to that unpleasantness, but no part of
Manson's body is exposed in that footage. Earlier in
the film, Manson drops in to the cop's apartment for
some booty calls, but all the good stuff occurs
off-camera. (She does later bare a single breast
when the baddies come back to rob her cafe, but in
other films she has done full frontal and rear
Those scenes seemed to be designed specifically for
nudity, but the nudity never happened.
Anyway, many women do get naked. See the nudity report
Pat Anderson - full frontal
Jeane Manson - one breast.
Liv Lindeland shows some first-class breasts as the
sexually frustrated wife of an elderly judge.
Katie Saylor strips down to have sex with ... Art Metrano,
who plays Dirty O'Neil's partner.
Several women get naked in the showers and locker room.
They play on a basketball team coached by Dirty O'Neil.
Two other members of that team, Tara Strohmeier and Kitty
Carl, strip in front of a glass door to tease their
Another woman comes out of a cake topless. Based on the
credits, using the process of elimination, I suppose that
she must be either Susan McIver or Linda Gold, but I can't
pin it down more definitely.
If you are not familiar with our grading system, you
need to read the
explanation, because the grading is not linear.
For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+
is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As.
Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:
As a narrative film it
sucks canal water, but I think it meets the minimum
genre requirements as an exploitation film.