by Tuna

DarkWolf (2003) is a direct-to-vid that came about because Richard Friedman wanted to create a film with a low budget and high production values. To him that meant lots of CGI, animatronics, and T&A.

He got the T&A right

As for the rest, he bought an expensive gorilla suit and ... er ... converted it into a male werewolf. He then created a female werewolf with the worst CGI this side of a video game.

In other words, as the great philosopher Aristotle once said about one of the forgotten Greek tragedies, "Assuming the reality of existence, and within that reality presupposing the existence of a good werewolf story ... this ain't it."

(I may have paraphrased a bit. My ancient Greek is rusty.)

In order for the story to work, Friedman needed to create a whole new werewolf mythology, and then explain it to the audience. Here is how it plays out. A huge biker-looking guy with glowing red eyes enters a strip club and grabs a pair of boobs (nobody said he was stupid, just nasty). The LA police arrive hot on his heels, subdue him, and throw him into the back of a wagon. He breaks through the metal separating the back from the cab, kills the driver and one of the cops, then leaves as a wolf. That leaves a veteran cop and a female rookie to track him down and subdue him.

They stop off at the precinct to grab some silver bullets and get a bunch of the exposition out of the way, then it is off to question a homeless lady (Tippi Hedren) who, it turns out, is hundreds of years old, and protector of the perfect female werewolf (Samaire Armstrong). La Perfecta works as a waitress, and has no idea she is a werewolf. Ol' DarkWolf must mate with her during the full moon that night, or his race dies forever. If he succeeds, normal werewolves die forever, as do humans. The female rookie cop (Jaime Bergman) rather quickly becomes wolf food, although Wolfie does manage to expose one of her breasts before dinner. With her out of the way,  the LAPD has nobody else they can assign to the case to assist the grizzled detective, despite the department's apparent werewolf preparedness (they do keep silver bullets on hand) and the fact that the fate of humanity hangs in the balance.

Online opinions seem split on the acting and the story line, but there's agreement on the bad gorilla costume and the even worse CGI. Within a lackluster effort, the only bright spot for me, besides the T&A, was Samaire Armstrong as the female wolf. She had a vulnerable quality I quite enjoyed, and then she grew balls when she needed them.


* widescreen anamorphic

* The DVD includes a "making of" featurette and a gag reel.







Not reviewed by any of the major reviewers.


3.0 IMDB summary (of 10)




  • Sasha Williams and Andrea Bogart wear nothing but vanity patches as they pose for photos on the roof.
  • The final showdown is arranged in such a way as to get a lengthy T&A lesbian scene out of Sasha Williams and Andrea Bogart.
  • Then we have the lengthy and pathetic CGI of Samaire Armstrong's character turning into a topless werewolf.
  • Jaime Bergman shows a bloody left breast after a visit from wolfie.
  • Katie Lohmann shows breasts giving a lap dance during the opening credits.


Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a: