from Mars (1988)
|Attack from Mars (1988) is
strictly in the bad movie genre. It is rated 2.8 of 10 at IMDB. Odd
people (nerds, fat lady, woman in petticoats, couples, hoods, etc)
arrive for a midnight feature at a theater in the 50s. The movie in an
episode of Space Patrol, which has some time travelers coming back to
the present. Also, there is a Martian monster loose in the theater
killing people. Before this is over, everyone appears in both the
movie within the movie, and the film itself. They made no effort at
all to keep the three plots separate.
|Tamara Sue Hill, as a fantasy
girl to one of the nerds, shows buns, after cleavage and bra
| The highlight of the
film is the bad dialogue, however, with lines like:
- "Oh darlin', the one-eyed
muff torpedo wants to go to tunaland tonight."
- "My Dick's harder than
- And in response to being told by
his girlfriend that she is having her period: "You bleed more
than a hemophiliac in a briar patch."
||Is it a good movie? Anything but. The
key question here is, is it entertaining. As a lover of really bad
movies, I have to say yes.
guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of
excellence, about like three and a half stars
from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm
watchability, about like two and a half stars
from the critics. The fives are generally not
worthwhile unless they are really your kind of
material, about like two stars from the critics.
Films under five are generally awful even if you
like that kind of film, equivalent to about one
and a half stars from the critics or less,
depending on just how far below five the rating
guideline: A means the movie is so good it
will appeal to you even if you hate the genre. B means the movie is not
good enough to win you over if you hate the
genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an
open mind about this type of film. C means it will only
appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover
appeal. D means you'll hate it even if you
like the genre. E means that you'll hate it even if
you love the genre. F means that the film is not only
unappealing across-the-board, but technically
inept as well.
Based on this
description, as a sci-fi or horror, it is an F, but as a
"Bad Movie," it is a four star C.
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